Author: Laurie Grenya

Client: I’ve got an employee who’s used up all their vacation and sick leave—but now they’re asking for additional time off to go on a vacation. I don’t want to be the bad guy, but this doesn’t sit right with me. How do I handle it?

Consultant: This is where boundaries meet fairness. When someone has used all their available leave, asking for more—especially for vacation—can create ripple effects. The key is to separate empathy from enabling and base your response on consistency and policy.

Client: So, what do I say without sounding harsh or unsupportive?

Consultant: Acknowledge the request and hold the line on the policy.

Try:
“I understand you’d like to take time off, and I want to support work-life balance. At the same time, you’ve used all of your accrued leave, and we can’t approve additional time off at this point.”

Client: What if they ask to take it unpaid?

Consultant: That’s a fair question—and it depends on your organizational policy. Some workplaces allow unpaid time off with approval; others don’t. What matters is being consistent.

You might say:
“We generally don’t approve unpaid time off for vacation when all leave has been used. If there’s a compelling reason, I can take it under consideration—but we also need to balance the operational impact.”

Client: What if they say they already booked the trip?

Consultant: That’s a ‘planning on permission’ move—not a best practice. You’re not obligated to accommodate it. Be firm.

Say:
“I understand the trip is already planned, and I wish the timing were different. Unfortunately, advance bookings don’t override our leave policies. If we allow this, it sets a precedent we can’t sustain.”

Client: Could I offer a compromise, like working extra hours to ‘make up’ the time?

Consultant: Only if it aligns with policy, job duties, and fairness to others. Allowing someone to bank time might be fine in salaried-exempt roles, but it’s riskier for hourly employees.

Try:
“We don’t have a flex system that allows ‘making up’ full days in advance. Leave policies are structured to ensure fairness, and we need to apply them consistently.”

Client: What if this turns into a morale issue?

Consultant: Sometimes saying ‘no’ causes frustration—but saying ‘yes’ causes confusion and resentment from others. Be clear, fair, and direct.

You might also preempt concerns by saying:
“We value time off, and we’re committed to managing it fairly. If someone needs additional time, they can plan ahead or save leave for future use. That ensures everyone’s treated equitably.”

Client: So, the message is—‘We care, and we also have to follow the rules’?

Consultant: Exactly. Supportive doesn’t mean soft. You can respect the request without approving it—and reinforce that policies exist to protect fairness and operations.

Recap:
✔ Acknowledge the request without guilt
✔ Review policy before responding
✔ Say no clearly if it’s not supported
✔ Offer limited flexibility only if consistent and operationally sound
✔ Reinforce fairness and planning going forward

And if you need help refining your time-off policies or communication strategies—we’re here to support you.

Client: We just filled a position, and one of the internal candidates who wasn’t selected is now refusing to help onboard the new hire. They’re clearly upset, and it’s creating tension. How do I handle this?

Consultant: Ah, the classic case of post-interview pouting. Internal applicants who aren’t selected may feel embarrassed, overlooked, or even betrayed—especially when expected to train the person who did get the job. Still, disappointment can’t excuse unprofessional behavior. Let’s get ahead of this before it festers.

Client: I get that they’re hurt, but refusing to onboard the new person is hurting the team. What should I say?

Consultant: You’ll want to acknowledge their disappointment, while resetting expectations for their role. Stay calm, clear, and constructive.

Try:
“I understand this outcome was frustrating, and I appreciate your interest in the position. That said, part of your current role includes supporting onboarding efforts, and I expect you to follow through on that responsibility. Let’s talk about how you can do that professionally.”

Client: What if they say they don’t want to train the person who got the job they wanted?

Consultant: That’s honest—and not optional. They don’t have to like it. They do have to do it.

You could say:
“You’re entitled to feel disappointed, and you’re still responsible for fulfilling your duties. Onboarding isn’t a personal favor—it’s part of your job.”

Client: What if I didn’t give them feedback about why they didn’t get the job? Could that be part of the issue?

Consultant: Very likely. Internal candidates deserve timely, honest, and constructive feedback. If that didn’t happen, now’s the time.

Try:
“I realize I didn’t provide feedback after the decision was made. Let’s have that conversation now so you can understand what went into the choice—and what to focus on for future opportunities.”

Client: What if they’re passive-aggressively undermining the new hire?

Consultant: That’s a red flag. Document it and address it directly.

Say:
“I’ve observed comments and behavior that are making onboarding more difficult. That’s not acceptable. I expect you to contribute to a professional, welcoming environment. Let’s talk about what that looks like moving forward.”

Client: What if they just need time to cool off?

Consultant: That’s fine—as long as the work still gets done. If they need space, offer it. If they’re avoiding responsibilities, that’s a separate conversation.

Offer:
“If you need some time to process this, let’s talk about how we can support that while still meeting onboarding needs. The work can’t pause, but we can find a way forward that’s fair to everyone involved.”

Client: So, the key is to acknowledge the disappointment, hold them accountable, and course-correct behavior?

Consultant: Exactly. You don’t have to rescue their feelings—you just have to lead with clarity and fairness. The goal is professionalism, not perfection.

Recap:
✔ Acknowledge the disappointment
✔ Reinforce expectations—onboarding is part of their role
✔ Offer feedback if it was missing
✔ Don’t tolerate sabotage—document and act
✔ Balance empathy with accountability

And if you need help navigating the tough conversation—or crafting internal feedback and onboarding protocols—we’re always here to support you.

Client: I’ve offered flexible work hours to support my team, but I’m starting to feel like one employee is stretching that flexibility a little too far. They’re not around when I need them, and some of their work is slipping. How do I address this without micromanaging?

Consultant: That’s a fair concern. Flexibility is a great tool—but only when it’s paired with accountability. Let’s walk through how to address this while keeping trust and performance in balance.

Client: Okay, so how do I bring it up without sounding accusatory?

Consultant: Start by focusing on outcomes, not hours. Look for patterns: missed deadlines, unavailability during critical hours, or team disruption. Then, frame the conversation around shared expectations.

You could say:
“I want to check in on how your schedule is working. I’ve noticed a few times when communication or project timelines have slipped, and I want to make sure we’re aligned on expectations.”

Client: What if they say they’re still working the same hours, just on their own time?

Consultant: That might be true—and still not working. Flexibility doesn’t mean invisibility. There has to be shared structure.

Try:
“I appreciate you managing your time, and we also need overlap for collaboration and responsiveness. Let’s talk about what availability looks like moving forward so we can support the team and get things done.”

Client: Should I start monitoring when they’re online or clocking in?

Consultant: Not unless they’re in a non-exempt role that requires it. Focus on the work, not the clock.

You can say:
“I’m not here to monitor hours—I’m here to make sure the work gets done and that everyone feels supported. Let’s figure out how we can make this schedule work for both you and the team.”

Client: What if nothing changes after the conversation?

Consultant: Then you need to escalate. Flexibility is earned and maintained by meeting expectations. If they’re not meeting them, it’s okay to rein things in.

You might say:
“We’ve discussed expectations, and I’m still seeing missed deadlines and inconsistent availability. At this point, we need to shift to a more structured schedule to ensure work is completed consistently.”

Client: What if the employee pushes back or says I’m treating them differently?

Consultant: That’s why consistency and documentation matter. If everyone else is thriving under the same structure, it’s reasonable to expect the same from them.

You can reinforce with:
“The flexibility we offer is built on trust and results. This isn’t about comparison—it’s about making sure we all meet our responsibilities.”

Client: So, I don’t have to cancel flexibility for the whole team?

Consultant: Not at all. Address the individual issue. Protect the policy by managing how it’s used—not removing it because one person isn’t holding up their end.

Client: This really helps. So, the key is expectations, outcomes, and fairness?

Consultant: Exactly. Flexibility is a tool—not a loophole. Lead with clarity, manage through performance, and stay consistent. If flexibility stops working, it’s okay to change the arrangement.

Recap:
✔ Define what flexibility means in your organization
✔ Focus on outcomes, not hours
✔ Revisit expectations early, not after frustration builds
✔ Adjust the individual schedule if necessary—don’t punish the group
✔ Document and follow up

And if you need help navigating those conversations—or crafting a flexible work policy that works for everyone—we’re always here to help.

Client: I have an employee returning to work after an injury, but I’m concerned they aren’t fully healed. They say they need the money, but I don’t want them to get hurt again. What should I do?

Consultant: You’re in a tough spot. You want to support your employee’s financial needs while ensuring their health and safety. The key is to follow medical guidance, maintain compliance with workplace safety laws, and find a solution that protects both the employee and the company.

Client: They say they’re fine, but I can tell they’re struggling. Can I stop them from coming back?

Consultant: If they’ve been cleared by a medical provider, you can’t automatically prevent them from working. However, you can require proper documentation and ensure any restrictions are followed.

Try this:
“I appreciate that you’re eager to return, and we want to make sure you do so safely. We’ll need a doctor’s note confirming any work restrictions or modifications needed to prevent further injury.”

This keeps the conversation focused on safety, not their financial situation.

Client: What if they refuse to provide a doctor’s note?

Consultant: If the injury required medical leave, you have the right to request return-to-work documentation. Without it, you can’t confirm they’re fit for duty.

You might say:
“For your safety, we need documentation from your doctor clearing you for work and outlining any restrictions. Until we have that, we need to hold off on your return to ensure you’re protected.”

This keeps the responsibility on them to provide medical clearance.

Client: Their doctor cleared them, but I can see they’re struggling with tasks. What do I do?

Consultant: If they’re visibly struggling, check whether their restrictions are being followed. If they don’t have restrictions and are still having difficulty, a follow-up medical evaluation might be needed.

Try this:
“I see that some tasks seem to be causing discomfort. Are you feeling okay doing this work, or do we need to revisit accommodations to ensure your safety?”

This allows them to acknowledge struggles without feeling pressured to push through pain.

Client: What if they admit they’re struggling but don’t want to reduce hours or take time off?

Consultant: Work with them to find a temporary modification that keeps them working safely. If applicable, offer light-duty tasks that align with their doctor’s recommendations.

You might say:
“We want to support your return while making sure you don’t risk re-injury. Let’s review what tasks we can adjust to make this transition smoother.”

This helps them keep earning while reducing the risk of further harm.

Client: What if they insist they can do everything, even though I can tell they’re pushing themselves too hard?

Consultant: If they’re exceeding documented restrictions or showing signs of strain, address it proactively.

You could say:
“I appreciate your commitment, and I know you want to be fully back. However, I need to ensure we’re following the medical guidelines. Let’s check in with your doctor to make sure we’re staying within safe limits.”

This reinforces that safety is the priority—not just their willingness to work.

Client: So, the key is to follow medical guidance, offer adjustments if needed, and not let financial concerns override safety?

Consultant: Exactly. Support the employee, and ensure they aren’t putting themselves at risk. A structured return-to-work approach protects both their well-being and the company.

And if you need help structuring accommodations or compliance reviews, we’re here to assist.

Client: I have an employee who never takes responsibility for mistakes. Anytime something goes wrong, they blame someone else or make passive-aggressive comments. How do I address this without making the situation worse?

Consultant: Dealing with passive-aggressive behavior is frustrating because it’s indirect, and it disrupts the team. The key is to focus on accountability, set clear expectations, and not get drawn into their deflections.

Client: How do I even start the conversation without them getting defensive?

Consultant: Approach it factually and keep emotions out of it. Focus on behaviors, not intentions.

Try this:
I’ve noticed that when issues come up, there’s a pattern of shifting blame instead of focusing on solutions. I want to talk about how we can improve communication and accountability moving forward.

This frames the conversation around team success rather than personal criticism.

Client: What if they deny it or make excuses?

Consultant: Passive-aggressive employees often avoid direct confrontation, so they may try to deflect. Instead of arguing, redirect the focus to expectations.

You might say:
“I’m not here to debate the past. What I need to see moving forward is ownership of responsibilities and a solution-focused approach when mistakes happen.”

This makes it clear that accountability is the expectation.

Client: What if they keep pointing fingers at their coworkers?

Consultant: Don’t engage in the blame game. Instead, shift the focus back to their role.

Try this:
“I hear that you’re frustrated, and I expect everyone to work together. Regardless of what others do, I need you to take responsibility for your own work and how you respond to challenges.”

This sets a boundary while keeping the conversation professional.

Client: What if they respond with sarcasm or passive-aggressive comments?

Consultant: Call out the behavior in a neutral way and reset expectations.

You could say:
“I want to keep this conversation productive. If something isn’t clear, let’s talk about it directly so we can find a solution together.”

This puts the responsibility on them to engage in a real conversation instead of hiding behind sarcasm.

Client: What if their behavior doesn’t change?

Consultant: If the pattern continues, you need to set formal expectations and document the issue.

You might say:
“We’ve talked about this before, and I’m still seeing the same behaviors. Moving forward, I expect accountability and professionalism. If this continues, we’ll need to take further steps to address it.”

This makes it clear that there are consequences for ongoing behavior issues.

Client: So, the key is to stay neutral, set expectations, and not engage in their deflections?

Consultant: Exactly. Stay direct, don’t take the bait, and focus on accountability. Passive-aggressive behavior thrives on avoidance—clear expectations and follow-through will help shift the dynamic.

And if you need help structuring a formal performance discussion, we’re here to support you.